Description

“YOU’VE BEEN TRAINING FOR THIS MOMENT YOUR WHOLE LIFE!” is stacked across five lines around a baby’s dummy, a bottle of milk and a striped lolly. The training equipment is all on display.

What is on the wrapper?

A blue and orange dummy top-left, a full baby bottle with a yellow teat to the right, and a fat multicoloured spiral lolly bottom-left, arranged around type in yellow, white, green, red, blue and gold. Nursery objects assembled into a claim about lifelong preparation, and it lands the moment you join the dots.

Is it a real condom?

Yes, and it is not a gag item with a gag inside. CE marked, ISO 4074 certified, 52mm nominal width (±2mm), 180mm-plus length, 4 to 5 years of shelf life. Only the wrapper is funny. Kissy Bang Bang started printing these in London in 2007 and has not stopped.

When to hand it out

Stag nights, new-baby jokes, birthdays and Secret Santa. One of the wordiest designs in the catalogue and one of the most read-aloud.

Ordering

From six pieces at £1.66 each, mixed however you like across the funny designs. Printed in London, posted discreetly, no branding on the outer. Next-day delivery £3.80.